Book Club Questions for Finding Me by Viola Davis

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Book club questions for Finding Me by Viola Davis explore the intimacy of oneself in this crazy, judgmental and competitive world.

This is a memoir that will bring you to the edge of your seats, packed with many philosophical questions that will ponder your mind. How do we embrace our childhood dreams or failures, and let go of shame? How can we become the best version of ourselves? What does it mean to persevere, to challenge ourselves, and to forgive?

Finding Me is a Oprah’s Book Club Pick and and rated as a Harpers Bazaar best book of 2022. It is a testament to resilience and hard work, brimming with love and heartbreak. Viola’s fulfilling narrative, and gorgeous storytelling will inspire any reader wishing to shed old labels. This is a story of hope, survival, and acceptance of oneself. A deeply moving memoir I truly recommend!

Below, I have written my discussion guide for Finding Me, the synopsis of the book, and 19 book club questions which will keep the book club discussion flowing high. Also, don’t forget to read my book recommendations below the questions!

I hope you will enjoy discussing my book club discussion questions for Finding Me!

Have fun analyzing the themes of the story with your book clubs, and let me know what are your thoughts. The following book club questions have been tailored to this book’s specific reading experience.✨

The Synopsis

In my book, you will meet a little girl named Viola who ran from her past until she made a life-changing decision to stop running forever.

This is my story, from a crumbling apartment in Central Falls, Rhode Island, to the stage in New York City, and beyond. This is the path I took to finding my purpose but also my voice in a world that didn’t always see me.

As I wrote Finding Me, my eyes were open to the truth of how our stories are often not given close examination. We are forced to reinvent them to fit into a crazy, competitive, judgmental world. So I wrote this for anyone running through life untethered, desperate and clawing their way through murky memories, trying to get to some form of self-love. For anyone who needs reminding that a life worth living can only be born from radical honesty and the courage to shed facades and be . . . you.

Finding Me is a deep reflection, a promise, and a love letter of sorts to self. My hope is that my story will inspire you to light up your own life with creative expression and rediscover who you were before the world put a label on you.

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Book Club Questions for Finding Me

1. Memoirs are often written so that the subject can take ownership and “tell their own story”. Do you think it is a smart move to reveal experiences and secrets to control the narrative?

2. For many years Viola saw herself as that 8-year-old girl constantly fleeing for her life. Are there moments in your life that have defined you; moments that continuously replay in your mind? How do you process those memories? What have you learned from them, if anything?

3. How does sharing her trauma help Viola take back the power from those situations where she felt powerless?

4. What do you think kept Viola going even in the darkest times?

5. A central element of Viola’s story is colorism: “When you are a dark-skinned girl,” she writes, “no one simply adores you.” She recalls grappling with feeling ugly and unseen, and later to acknowledge the role it played in her pain. How important do you feel this thinking/trauma played in her overall life story?

6. Viola found acting to be an outlet and coping mechanism at an early age. Why do you think this particular activity allowed her to claw her way out of her everyday life?

7. In the memoir, Davis calls out her “warrior fuel”—something inside her that kept her from giving in to defeat. Is there anything in your life that you consider your warrior fuel?

8. How did her parents’ relationship shape Viola’s relationships and thoughts on parenting?

9. Viola had 3 ceremonies with her husband Julius. What role do you think he and their love story played in her life?

10. At several points the memoir Viola discusses her desire/need to help her family out financially (when she finally got to a place where she was making “a little money”). “I thought I could save them. I thought my money and success could save all of them. I learned the hard way that when there are underlying issues, money does nothing. In fact, money exacerbates the problem because it takes away the individual’s ability to be held accountable.” How do you think she handled boundaries and her family’s financial issues?

11. Viola’s story reminds us that it’s never too late for a new beginning. (Chapter 16 – “My biggest discovery was that you can literally re-create your life. You can redefine it. You don’t have to live in the past.”) Have you ever re-created your life?

12. What are your thoughts on Viola’s trip to Africa? What did this experience do to her? Do for her?

Bonus Book Club Questions

These are my additional book club questions that take a different approach on analyzing certain themes of the book.

13. One of the quotes Viola called out several times after her trip was a Mandinka Ritual Song. What do you think is meant by “I did not come here for food. My stomach is full. I did not come here for food. I came here for much more than that.”

14. What was your favorite chapter or story?

15. What was your biggest takeaway(s) from reading Viola’s story?

16. Viola’s story of shifting from running away from her abusers to standing up to them is metaphoric of dealing with the problems that confront us. Do you run away or stand up to your problems? Is there a specific experience where you did either? How did it change you?

17. Do you consider yourself worthy? If yes, why? If not, what do you have to do to be worthy?

18. What about Viola Davis owning her story inspires you to own yours?

19. Who are YOU?

Additional Recommendations

Hope you enjoyed my book club and discussion questions for Finding Me by Viola Davis!

Here are some more of my book club recommendations:

Becoming by Michelle Obama

In a life filled with meaning and accomplishment, Michelle Obama has emerged as one of the most iconic and compelling women of our era. As First Lady of the United States of America—the first African American to serve in that role—she helped create the most welcoming and inclusive White House in history, while also establishing herself as a powerful advocate for women and girls in the U.S. and around the world, dramatically changing the ways that families pursue healthier and more active lives, and standing with her husband as he led America through some of its most harrowing moments. Along the way, she showed us a few dance moves, crushed Carpool Karaoke, and raised two down-to-earth daughters under an unforgiving media glare.

In her memoir, a work of deep reflection and mesmerizing storytelling, Michelle Obama invites readers into her world, chronicling the experiences that have shaped her—from her childhood on the South Side of Chicago to her years as an executive balancing the demands of motherhood and work, to her time spent at the world’s most famous address. With unerring honesty and lively wit, she describes her triumphs and her disappointments, both public and private, telling her full story as she has lived it—in her own words and on her own terms. Warm, wise, and revelatory, Becoming is the deeply personal reckoning of a woman of soul and substance who has steadily defied expectations—and whose story inspires us to do the same.

Just as I Am: A Memoir by Cicely Tyson

“In her long and extraordinary career, Cicely Tyson has not only succeeded as an actor, she has shaped the course of history.” –President Barack Obama, 2016 Presidential Medal of Freedom ceremony

“Just as I Am is my truth. It is me, plain and unvarnished, with the glitter and garland set aside. In these pages, I am indeed Cicely, the actress who has been blessed to grace the stage and screen for six decades. Yet I am also the church girl who once rarely spoke a word. I am the teenager who sought solace in the verses of the old hymn for which this book is named. I am a daughter and a mother, a sister and a friend. I am an observer of human nature and the dreamer of audacious dreams. I am a woman who has hurt as immeasurably as I have loved, a child of God divinely guided by his hand. And here in my ninth decade, I am a woman who, at long last, has something meaningful to say.” – Cicely Tyson

Thank you for reading my book club questions and happy reading! ❤️